I Am the ‘Boys Have a Penis’ Kid from the Classic 1990 Film: An Interview.

Arnold Schwarzenegger is best known as an iconic tough guy. Yet, in the midst of his star power in the late 20th century, he also headlined several surprisingly great comedies. Chief among them is Kindergarten Cop, which celebrates its 35-year mark this winter.

The Story and That Line

In the 1990 movie, Schwarzenegger plays a hardened detective who masquerades as a schoolteacher to track down a criminal. During the movie, the investigation plot acts as a simple backdrop for Schwarzenegger to have charming moments with his young class. The most unforgettable features a little boy named Joseph, who out of nowhere stands up and informs the former bodybuilder, “Boys have a penis, and girls get a vagina.” The Terminator deadpans, “Thanks for the tip.”

The young actor was portrayed by child star Miko Hughes. His career included a notable part on Full House as the bully to the famous sisters and the character of the youngster who comes back in the film version of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. He still works in film today, with a slate of movies on the horizon. Additionally, he is a regular on popular culture events. Not long ago discussed his recollections from the set of Kindergarten Cop 35 years later.

A Young Actor's Perspective

Question: Starting off, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: I believe I was four. I was the most junior of all the kids on set.

Wow, I don't recall being four. Do you have any memories from that time?

Yeah, to a degree. They're snapshots. They're like picture memories.

Do you recall how you landed the job in Kindergarten Cop?

My parents, primarily my mom would take me to auditions. Sometimes it was like a cattle call. There'd be dozens of children and we'd all just have to wait, enter the casting office, be in there for a very short time, deliver a quick line they wanted and that was it. My parents would feed me the lines and then, once I learned to read, that was some of the first material I was reading.

Do you have an impression of meeting Arnold? What was your impression of him?

He was extremely gentle. He was fun. He was nice, which I suppose stands to reason. It would have been odd if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom, that likely wouldn't create a positive atmosphere. He was fun to be around.

“It would be strange if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom.”

I understood he was a big action star because I was told, but I had never really seen his movies. I sensed the excitement — like, that's cool — but he didn't frighten me. He was just fun and I only wanted to hang out with him when he wasn't busy. He was working hard, but he'd sometimes engage here and there, and we would cling to his muscles. He'd flex and we'd be dangling there. He was really, really generous. He purchased for each child in the classroom a yellow cassette player, which at the time was like an iPhone. It was the coolest device, that funky old yellow cassette player. I played the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for ages on that thing. It eventually broke. I also have a genuine metal whistle. He had the teacher's whistle, and the kids all received one too as well.

Do you remember your experience as being fun?

You know, it's funny, that movie was this cultural thing. It was a huge film, and it was an incredible opportunity, and you would think, as an adult, I would want my memories to be of working with Arnold, the legendary director, visiting Astoria, being on a professional set, but my memories are of being a finitely child at lunch. For example, they got everyone pizza, but I wasn't a pizza fan. All I would eat was the toppings only. Then, the original Game Boy was brand new. That was the hot thing, and I was pretty good at it. I was the smallest kid and some of the bigger kids would ask for my help to get past hard parts on games because I knew how, and I was quite pleased with myself. So, it's all youthful anecdotes.

The Infamous Moment

OK, the penis and vagina line, do you remember how it happened? Did you know what you were saying?

At the time, I wasn't fully aware of what the word shocking meant, but I realized it got a reaction and it got a big laugh. I knew it was kind of something I wouldn't usually utter, but I was given approval in this case because it was humorous.

“It was a difficult decision for her.”

How it came about, according to family lore, was they hadn't finalized all the dialogue. Certain bits of dialogue were part of the original screenplay, but once they had the kids together, it wasn't necessarily improv, but they refined it on set and, I suppose someone in charge came to my mom and said, "We have an idea. We want Miko to have this line. Are you okay with this?" My mom didn't agree right away. She said, "I need to consider this, I need time" and took a day or two. She deliberated carefully. She said she wasn't sure, but she believed it will probably be one of the most memorable lines from the movie and she was right.